Let’s talk about how to be bold! Or as I like to think of it, becoming bold. Taking a stand for what you believe. Starting a business or living out a dream. Making a life shift or major decision. There are so many reasons why boldness is a characteristic we need to spend some time on.
When I first met Wynne Elder, I knew there was something about her that was different. I couldn’t quite put my finger on it until I got to know her a little better. She’s incredibly bold. A trait I admire and aspire to adapt. When we talked about doing this podcast series on Becoming Bold I knew I was about to learn more than I was bargaining for.
There are moments in life that define us. If you look back at your journey there are peaks and valleys you can easily pick out, but are your peaks as high as you want them to be? Have you taken the leaps you wish you had? Or are you floating a little bit? Lately does it seem like you just can’t pull the trigger on the big stuff? The stuff you know will make a lasting difference. Instead you keep hiding behind obligation, you tell yourself you just “have to”, “I wish” or “that would be nice”.
As this series on the Unhurried Life Podcast unfolds, I want to give you a little (gentle but firm) kick in the bottom. We all need one of those every once in a while and it seems more genuine coming from a friend. Rope a friend in on this.Pull in a sister to go through this series on Becoming Bold together. It’s called accountability and it’s a lost art in my opinion.
We are one of the most disconnected generations, yet have the most “opportunity” for connection. This is real life connection I’m talking about, not social or digital. Since I can’t crawl through your computer (creepy) and sit down next to you all I can do is say, “go first”. Ask a friend to join you as we chip away at the complacency and let true boldness shine through. Have a standing zoom date, grab coffee once a week for a few weeks, find someone to plan this with.
If you don’t make a noticeable change in your current pattern or routine not much will be different. When you step out and alter your current sense of security, breaking the mold, you will see a new you.
WHAT IS A BOLD PERSON LIKE?
This week we’re talking stories and the steps that we take to make up the path we’re on. One of my favorite things about this life is getting to know and even have the chance to be part of others stories! Wynne’s story has a lot of cool stuff woven into it and most of the opportunities she’s had she equates to her boldness in “just asking”.
Adoption, starting a business, moving cities, and so much more. These things are part of how she’s grown in boldness. As Wynne unpacked her story I found that she was mainly talking about 6 main characteristics for how to be bold.
6 CHARACTERISTICS OF A BOLD PERSON
- Speaking Truth
- Going First
When you’re developing your confidence try to approach it from within, your self talk. I know it may seem cheesy and you’re probably nodding and about to write this one off but believe me, the words and way in which you talk to yourselves matter. When learning to be bold start with confidently talking to yourself!
Becoming bold doesn’t happen overnight. Wynne talks about their adoption journey taking years. However, the more you can speak truth out loud as you’re dreaming and believing, you can have these opportunities easier and it will be to let boldness become a top characteristic.
Maybe this is the simplest and the hardest. You may want to use the enneagram or your personality as a shield here. It’s just “not the way you are”. But listen. Going first is not easy for anyone, I’m a 7, outgoing and confident by nature. It is still awkward and hard for me to go first. I once heard great wisdom from a dear friend when we were talking about relationships.
Be the friend you want to have. That means going first, making the ask and taking the step! Yes, you risk rejection and the first time is hard, so is the second…ok, all rejection is hard but that does not mean you stop asking, it just means you get better at doing it again.
Brave and Bold seem to be close to the same thing to me with one little difference. When you are brave, it means you are scared too. When you are bold it means you are stepping out. Bravery means sometimes you wear your heart on your sleeve and you know it will get hurt but you do it anyways!
This is one of the best things you can do when you’re practicing self talk and confidence building. Try grabbing the book, The Complaint Free World.
The first step to being more positive is acknowledging you may be negative. I know, it sounds weird but if you can catch yourself and become aware of your negative talk you can combat it with positivity!
I don’t expect you to become bold overnight. In fact learning to be bold takes time, even years. That’s why this is a series and not just one episode or one blog post. Visualizing your goals and dreams is a great thing to do when developing your patience.
IS IT GOOD TO BE BOLD?
There is a fine tipping point when it comes to being bold and being bossy. If there’s one thing I have started to learn about how to be bold it’s that when you step out, when you make a choice or change of direction, when you chase you do so out of service.
If you’re chasing out of self service, you may be close to getting off track.
For example, there is a difference in asking for an opportunity because you believe it will better your family and those around you, versus asking for the opportunity because it’s just what you want and will serve your desires.
Try asking yourself this question when you’re evaluating boldness vs. bossiness. Who will this serve?
HOW DO YOU BECOME BOLD?
Over on the podcast Wynne points out that trying new things has pushed her to grown in becoming bold. Not only does trying out new things help improve your skill set but it allows you to find your passions all while serving others.
Trying new things is not the easiest path. Wynne said, “It terrified me, knowing I could let others down, there was pressure, people were counting on me.”
Becoming bold is not always going to be sunshine and roses. There are hard times, terrifying times, and times of growth.
Next week we officially kick off the Becoming Bold series. My true hope is that this is not just something you listen to or read, but that it’s something you put into action, something that makes a lasting impact and reshapes your life. This is big stuff.
Our hope is that you grab a friend and go through this series together. We talk a lot about going first. Being the friend you want to have. So here is your chance. Send this episode or this blog post to a friend and ask her to come along with you and work on this life thing together.
Next week we’ll have a guide for you to print out and follow along so you have action steps to take. But let me just encourage you to plan on this. Get it on the calendar. Next, Tuesday is when the episode will come out but if another night works, plan for that one.
We know getting together is hard right now, not just because of COVID but life too. If you can set up a Zoom or Facetime with your buddy that is such a great idea!
Now don’t forget the doors to my photo organization workshop are closing in just a few days this is your last chance to join for free!
Each and every one of us have a story to share, but too many people have no idea where to begin when it comes to telling their story with photos. These are the final days that I’m hosting a photo organization workshop: 3 reasons why organizing your photos is actually way easier than you think. If you just need to get something accomplished and finally crossed off your NY resolution list c’mon!
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